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Ten Things Couples Discuss on the Suburban, Rich-People Channel
- Why he still hasn’t hung the twinkle lights in the garden.
2. The fact that he said, “the cat you drew looks like an ostrich.” When he actually said, “I told you it looked like a kangaroo.”
3. Antique clock faces. He just bought it — she wants it — and a game of darts ensues.
4. Which offer to accept on the mountain cabin, still owned by a divorced couple, after all these years …
5. Whether to run for Governor (his mother’s bucket list) or move to Tuscany (his girlfriend’s bucket list).
6. Plaster or drywall when restoring the mansion on Elm Street.
7. What time the progressive dinner begins, and whether they’re responsible for appetizers or desert.
8. Follow-up argument: Are appetizers and hors d’oeuvre the same, or are they different?
9. Whether the doctor’s son should study follow game design, like he thinks he wants, or go pre-med. A failed physics exam is involved. Sensitive aside: Is the stepmother’s opinion relevant?
10. Why he didn’t tell her that he was planning to split a bottle of expensive Champagne with his ex. Awkward
I would go on, but I’m totally caught up in the hygge storyline and all the feels, and I have three more seasons to watch. I don’t know why there aren’t any people of color on the screen, though. It’s almost like these shows weren’t shot in our country, or reflective of our society as a whole. Still, that pumpkin-carving festival was a blast, and I’m going to do everything in my power to hunt down that recipe for apple-cider donuts.
